Take my silence on the blog as a good thing – I’ve been working my ass off.
However, I find myself incredibly frustrated with the fact that I feel like I am constantly failing at everything I do. It’s never been about “winning” by any means, it’s only ever been about the learning… But with the process of acting, I think it’s safe to say that you never really feel that you’ve “finished”, there’s always more to learn and more levels to climb. I liken it to paddling for the shore, where there is absolutely no shore in sight at all.
I’ve devoted the last three and a half months of my life to making the drama school my top priority but I made a serious mistake in the process… I forgot to enjoy it! I’ve been taking it and class so damn seriously that I feel I have left some of “me” behind and I’m just being an “actor”. So, as we are being assessed this week, I’ve had loads of fun in creating my character and it’s almost like, the teething pains that I’ve gone through are evaporating to allow this creation to come through – don’t get me wrong she’s an awful, awful character, but I love her because she’s alive to me.
I’ve mastered my general American accent and I’m totally delighted with that! I booked my first voice over job as an honorary American, with an actual American client so I was terrified. But she was happy, gave me two corrections and then said it was perfect. Phew.
One thing I can take away from my hard work at the drama school – I did my absolute best, and I’m not afraid of falling and getting up and trying again. Because do you know what… no one tells you how frequently and how hard you will fall down. It’s the getting back up again that’s the secret.